Aww hell, it's Helstone

Sarah Palin gets restraining orders against a guy sending her parents mean emails, and the guy’s father, and yet I can’t get a restraining order against my next door neighbor for yelling death threats into my bedroom window and having his friends demand I come outside so they can jump me? I didn’t even ask for the stay-away option, simply that he keep his mouth shut and not harass us. But the court told me no today. Meanwhile, I guess blocking an email address is just too hard and emotionally taxing - way harder than the constant stress and fear of having someone lurking outside and watching your bedroom habits.

Not being rich and famous in America sure sucks.

Look out, it’s a trap!

When you send me a link to a photographer’s website for a specific reason, letting me know that you’re naked on the main page would be nice. I know we’re friends and we’ve gone skydiving and scuba diving together, but some warning before seeing your tits unexpectedly would still be nice. Especially when I’m at work. Much appreciated!

I’m so fucking sick of the Republicans. “We’re going to default on loans unless you say all the rich people can keep their money AND you kill public healthcare and let the poor people starve, BLEARGH!”

Aww, you guys, I found Jerri Blank’s little sister!

I’m such a dork. I saw this and immediately thought “Tenth Doctor!”

christinahaberkern:

Argyle Socks by Brent Couchman

I like how Google Translate’s home page says they can translate over 50 languages simultaneously, yet 5 of the 24 examples are French, and another 6 are just plain old German. If that’s Google’s repertoire, then perhaps they’d like to hire me as a translator? I’m in the midst of an internship with a translating company and I do French, German and English, so that’s roughly half of what they’ve got to offer. I should make BANK.

Also, since I’m looking into attending the Sorbonne instead of the horrifically expensive AUP, I’ve got some more time to waste in LA. More French, and I’m seriously considering starting Russian. FEAR MEEEEEEEE.

As it turns out, vowing to stay in bed all day is the best thing I’ve ever done. I applied for an internship with a translation company, and within half an hour they replied and asked for an interview tomorrow morning. I feel like this is the first time my academic achievements actually mean something to someone other than myself.

… but no matter how smart I am, I still can’t get a job as a bartender. WTF, world.

Look, all I want is a guy that looks/acts/sounds like Jarvis and is as clever and talented as him. Is that so fucking much to ask?

(Source: jarviscockerstyle)

Ugh, I miss that wicked little grin so much! When he smiled at me for the first time I finally knew what it meant to melt into a puddle.

(Source: jarviscockerstyle)